Monday, December 27, 2010

Aw, Christmas

Well, I'd like to report that Christmas came and went with me being 100% on plan ... but ... well ... it didn't. To be honest, I was a complete wreck. It was probably one of the hardest Christmas' I've had in ages and truth be told, I let myself wallow in the pity of a lonely Christmas far longer than I should have. I beat myself up one side and down the other and in so doing, gave into the cravings for food I didn't need or sometimes even like.

There's no need to offer up all the goofy details here but I will tell you that in a world where Christmas is about families, traditions, and kiddos ... it's tough to not have any of those things and in fact be further from having them than I thought I was. I used to laugh at the whole biological clock discussion but it was my reality this year.

I feel very selfish for getting so far down in the pity party because the truth is that I have wonderful parents that work hard to make the holidays a lovely, wonderful time. And, they were ... once I pulled my head outta my "you know what".

I'm not necessarily looking forward to the scale tomorrow. It will reflect my off plan food choices and I'm sure I'll backtrack a bit in my progress. I'm still going to show up though and weigh in and face the music. I need to.

On another note, 2011 is my year of repair. In fact, that's my word for the year. I'm going to repair myself emotionally, physically, financially, mentally, and spiritually. This will be my biggest year of change. I'll be 34 this year and as I approach midlife, I want to be whole and ready for whatever comes up around the next bend.

I love the definition of the word REPAIR as it has so many implications. I'm excited to see where this word will take me.

–verb (used with object)
1. to restore to a good or sound condition after decay or damage; mend: to repair a motor.
2. to restore or renew by any process of making good, strengthening, etc.: to repair one's health by resting.
3. to remedy; make good; make up for: to repair damage; to repair a deficiency.
4. to make amends for; compensate: to repair a wrong done.

5. an act, process, or work of repairing: to order the repair of a building.
6. Usually, repairs.
a. an instance or operation of repairing: to lay up a boat for repairs.
b. a repaired part or an addition made in repairing: 17th-century repairs in brick are conspicuous in parts of the medieval stonework.
7. repairs, (in bookkeeping, accounting, etc.) the part of maintenance expense that has been paid out to keep fixed assets in usable condition, as distinguished from amounts used for renewal or replacement.
8. the good condition resulting from continued maintenance and repairing: to keep in repair.
9. condition with respect to soundness and usability: a house in good repair.

This week I'll be reflecting, redefining, and gearing up to face 2011 head on. It's going to be a spectacular year!

1 comment:

  1. You have my heart. Your website was the first one that really motivated me to lose weight. I will be sending you positive thoughts and prayers for your emotional recovery. Once you have that, the dieting will come naturally. Best wishes for a happy new year. Gracie


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