Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Unhelpful Helpers

People like to offer advice.

I do it too. When I see someone doing something I think I might kinda sorta know something a little tiny bit about ... well, I've just gotta butt in and tell them all about it and how they should be doing it and how it works best, etc.

Thanks to The Healthy Weigh and learning all about "backpacks", I'm getting a bit better about stopping that behavior and instead only controlling the things about me that I can control.

But me knowing this hasn't stopped others from attempting to "help" me along my journey.

Believe me, I've heard it all from how many calories I should be consuming, to what foods to eat, to how to exercise ... and it's all unsolicited!

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate comments from others that are going through the same or similar journey. We're all in this together and all and I really enjoy the camaraderie that comes with sharing and experiencing this adventure together.

But when people who have never had to battle with weight offer opinion on my weight loss, well, it's annoying!

Someone the other day was actually telling me that I needed to eat more starch because two servings wasn't enough to survive. They were adamant and had read somewhere (oh boy, that sounds like ME!) that decreasing starch had a negative impact in the long term.

Now, as much as I wanted so desperately to listen to this person (I LOVE STARCH!), I also know that they weren't experts in this area and just because they had read something somewhere at some point didn't mean that resource was all knowing either.

I actually put a quick end to the conversation and I'm proud of myself for doing so. I was nice and smiling when I said: "Hey, thanks for your opinions but I've lost over 100 pounds with only two servings of starch so I think it's workin' out pretty good for my body to eat this way. However, if I get to a point where I'm not losing, I'll be sure to talk with the clinic about the reasons why and adjust accordingly."


It's tough to stand up for ourselves sometimes isn't it? But the truth is that I am being successful as I lose this weight. Yet I still question it sometimes. Having others question it too doesn't help so I'm getting better about shutting that down before those questions seep into my brain.

I'm so close to my goal. The last thing I need is to let those negative thoughts back into my head.


  1. Great riposte! Am cutting and pasting to my memory to use next time I get unsolicited advice!

  2. Good way to end that lecture. :)

  3. Just stick your fingers in your ears and do the "la la la, I'm not listening!" thing. You look amazing and you ARE amazing. Two different things, in case you were wondering. Proud of you, my friend. :)


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