Wednesday, June 10, 2009

"Thanks, but ...."

I went into The Healthy Weigh the other day and Letha and Glenda complimented me on my outfit. The first thing out of my mouth was "Oh, thanks, but these pants give me a bit of a 'muffin top'."

Um, really? Somone offers me a nice compliment and my response has to do with something so unpleasant as fat rolling over the top of my pants (hence 'muffin top')? Really? Ick.

As soon as I said it, I wanted to stop time and then plunk each word from the air and back into my mouth before they reached Letha and Glenda's ears. REWIND!

Letha's response, "Oh. Well. I guess that's why you wear a shirt you can leave untucked!"

Isn't she just so positive?

Meanwhile I'm thinking to myself that it's such a shame that I can't seem to just accept compliments with a smile and be happy about it.

Like when someone compliments me on how much weight I've lost and how good I look. My response, "Thanks, but I still have a long way to go."

I'm so silly! Why not just leave it at "Thanks!" and be done with it?

Well, by offering up the negative, I'm defeating the compliment. I have a hard time believing too many positive things about myself. It's something I'm working on ... but every once in awhile my old brain takes back over and I lose ground, slipping back into my "Thanks, but ...." routine.

Those times are when I wish there was a freeze time, rewind option in life so that I could go back and remove everything after the initial "thanks".

It takes a lot for most people to offer compliments. I'm not sure why, but it seems that in our culture praising the good is almost a taboo thing. So, when someone does offer up a nice tidbit, I need to be gracious in my reception.

This is something I'm continuing to work on and will one day be successful at. In the meantime, if you offer me a compliment and my face gets all squishy while I force my lips closed after the "Thanks!", hopefully you'll understand and not take it too personally!

4 comments:

  1. OMGosh I'm the same way and have been trying to break myself of the auto self-effacing response for a year. You are right, it defeats the compliment somewhat to have an immediate negative reply. I still have trouble with the "Thanks but I still have a lot to go" reply. I will work on that more consciously too!

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  2. I do that too! I also don't believe people's sincerety either which is really bad of me.

    Gracious receipt of compliments is so much nicer. I too am working on it.

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  3. I am the same way! I am learning like you but I think I will always have to "check" myself

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  4. Wendy! You're progress pics are AMAZING. You look great! :) I totally understand the whole not-being-able-to-take-a-compliment thing...I do the SAME thing. And I'm trying to make a conscious effort to stop!! :)

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