Monday, June 29, 2009

Pushing Myself to the Brink

I say these things a lot:
  • Ok I'm serious this time and I'm going to start doing everything on plan.
  • I should write down all my daily foods.
  • I really need to weigh and measure all my food.


But somehow those statements don't always turn into reality. I know the things I need to do to stay focused and complete this journey and yet sometimes I just can't seem to muster the energy to do what needs to be done.

Inevitably, those are the times when I don't lose or (gasp) actually gain a pound.

It's weird really that we can speak something out loud and yet our brains don't make the connection with the words.

When faced with my next meal, my brain doesn't even remember the should's, need's to, and going's to. It instead is focused on that very instant and not the end result of that instant.

A friend and I were talking awhile ago and she related that she has this very same problem. So, she put a rubber band around her wrist to remind her of her commitment to the weight loss journey. She's sees that rubber band each time she reaches for food and therefore it's a good reminder of what she's working on.

That's a neat idea although I can't seem to wear plastic things 'cause I break out in little bumps so that method won't work for me.

Instead I've got to figure out how to make a connection with my brain and truly commit this as a life change. As Letha would say, I need to make a decision and cut myself off from ANY other possibilities!

And perhaps that's the issue. If I can tell myself that I have no other options and it would click in my silly brain, I would be successful.

I've had these moments before. I know this is trite but sometimes it really is like a light bulb goes off in my head when I truly commit to the change.

I'm not exactly sure what makes the difference and how to flip that light bulb switch. I wish I could do it just by willing it to be so but it seems that I need something to really push me to the brink to commit fully.

And thus, today I'm in search of that "thing" to push me there. I know I need to be fully committed to being on plan in order to push through these last pounds. Now I just need to put that knowing into doing.

I keep saying the words to myself and am hoping that they will sink in eventually.

Today my truth is that motivation is in the doing.

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